eating everything.

you know how chinese people are famous for eating anything that can move? in ancient china, they used to eat dogs and bats. actually, they probably still eat all that and more today.

i had kangaroo meat in australia.. (it was tough and chewy)
and pig's fallopian tubes near my grandpa's office in kl.. (slippery and soft like sotong)

what have you had? :)

Follow the leader.

Word: Obese

Synonyms: adipose, baby elephant, blimp, bulky, butterball, corpulent, fat, fatso, fleshy, gross, heavy, hefty, hippo, outsize, overblown, paunchy, plump, porcine, portly, pudgy, roly poly, rotund, stout, tubby, weighty, whale

Expand your vocabulary, dont always use the same old boring words. Stay smart kids.

i am perturbed.

kfc in kl is discontinuing the hot and spicy range. tell me it's not true. someone stop them!

End of the road.

Why do people make their beds after they wake up? Most people anyway. All you do is leave it for half the day and sleep in it and make the same mess. So why clean up when you know its gonna happen again. Its quite pointless isnt it?

Its not like washing dishes where if you leave them unattended, gunk can grow on the plates. Can gunk grow on beds if left unattended? In my opinion, an unmade bed is just so much more comfortable, cause the blanket and pillows are all nicely placed. You dont have to rearrange the pillows to your personal requirements again. Its good fun. By the way, i do not make my bed, my maid does. :)

tee tee eff en.

it's catching on; i found a random new yorker's blog and they used it. oh yeaaaaaaah. hahahaha. soon everybody will be walking around with unbrushed hair and dorky glasses. i am a trend setter. i started globesity.

what's better, orange biscuits or chocolate biscuits?

annoying eating habits.

why do people dress up to go out and eat only salads as an entree...
just stay at home and eat your grass.

Hero.

No new posts.


Nobody likes you.


Get a life already.


You still reading this?

New quip.

I was just thinking, you know when you see melawns down the street or whatever, you have the option of yelling out or tell yourself in your mind "MELAWNS". Now, i need to come up with a word for uglys that come roaring by. There are too many around, its the least i can do to keep myself amused. Or maybe any other word to describe anyone else you can think of..



Edit: Someone just walked past, and omg, we need to come up with that word quick so i can use it already. She looked like some frankenstein woman, seriously, only shorter. urgh.

satu pokok bukit.

If im watching it, you should too.

November Rain.

May i present to you, an original Becky.





These are MGB exclusive scans and cannot be found anywhere else on the net. Notice the unique handwriting style, spelling and the distinct signature of the artist, the beckybouse. The artist effortlessly makes a card come to life with excellent use of blue markers. Soon, the beckybouse will be a worldwide phenomenon and i will sell this masterpiece on ebay if the need arises.

So awful.

We are cruel human beings, to laugh at those jokes. And then we wonder why the world is so messed up.

On a lighter note, I have another one:

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?




Make him clap until his daddy comes home.

I am ashamed. But amused. To be honest though, you can't care until these things are properly personified. And I realise the anonymity and objectification of the subject in our society sucks, but that's just the way it is. (I'm pre-empting any lectures willy and i might get.) Everybody have a nice day now.

Such Great Heights.

Why did the girl fall off the swing?




Because she had no arms.



Its harsh, but so funny. Now go make fun of people in wheelchairs. Making good jokes are like teasing fat people, its too easy..

Disappear.

Why did the boy fall off his bicycle?




Because someone threw a fridge at him.



hahahaha. Key to joke, try visualizing it.

Stalkers take note.

http://google.com is possibly the greatest thing ever created. I mean, you can find ANYTHING under the sky. But have you ever googled someone's name? You'd be surprised what you can find. Like people's email address. Talk about being easy targets for stalkers.. Here's a tip, google Rebecca Tan Xu Xian and you can send her all the porn in the world. Her email is listed under the first result from google. hahahah.

Its too cool to not check out.

boohoo.

i thought my fellow gourmands might care to know..
im feeling reeaalllly hungry.
but i don't know what i feel like having.
boohoo... if thats not sad, i dont know what is.

p.s. moonlight, note that i used your word of the day. teehee.

Mack the knife.

New theme kids.

Word of the day.

Gourmand:

1. A lover of good food.
2. A gluttonous eater.
3. A person who is devoted to eating and drinking to excess.

You cant make this stuff up. http://dictionary.reference.com

Feel free to add word of the days. You can add stupid words like keeyoot too if you want to.

This post is dedicated to becky. She is a gourmand.

theme songs that stick to you.

so, after downloading the sesame street theme song.. i started to think about other annoying theme songs that we grew up with and that are still stuck at the back of my head.

*paaaaddle pop, hey! paaaddle pop, hey! super duper yummy! (teehee.. by far, the best advertising theme song there is. mmm, and especially with the multi-coloured rainbow milky icecream)

*i dont wanna grow up, im a toys r us kid, lalala... (sorry geoffrey, i forgot the rest of it)

okie, im done entertaining you lot with my singing.

Barely Breathing.

At this point, I'm just going to start titling posts based on whatever song happens to be running through Winamp at the time. Therefore, if I happen to ever title a post something like, "Fuck tha Police" or something, just keep right on moving. It doesn't mean anything. This post is, of course, courtesy of Duncan Shiek.

If any of you are ever bored jobless when on the net. You should visit this site

http://urbandictionary.com

Apart from regine, i doubt you other piggys know of it. Its the best dictionary around..

Here's a preview.

Friendster:

• Web to web of stupid idiotic individuals who thinks the number of of people in their friendslist is in proportion to their self worth.
• an online networking service for the people who dont have any friends and desparately asking to be someone's friend.

Yes, i conform to society. And cue becky saying how she's cool and she deleted her friendster account blah blah.

tv cartoons.

i think my all-time favourite cartoon is the simpsons. i don't think i know anyone who doesn't like it. its the funniest cartoon on tv ever.

gawd awful cartoons (from way back in our day) that they still show on tv:-
*captain planet (fire.. earth.. water.. wahahaha)
*carebears (oh, adventures in carelot. carebears shine!)
*ghostbusters (theres something strange in the neighbourhood... whoyougonnacall... )
*teenage mutant ninja turtles (yup, they still eat loads of pizza)

and even worse, are those cartoons they dub in malay. especially the one about the blue fat cat/rat/creature with the japanese name. gayness.. heehee.

Popstar Donkeys

There was once this band of donkeys.

The first donkey played the bass.

The second donkey played the drums.

The third donkey played the electric guitar.

The fourth donkey played the keyboards.

The fifth donkey sang songs.

The sixth donkey is you who's reading this.

Because the sixth donkey is all about a lack of intelligence.Obviously, you... err... qualify, since you've actually wasted your time reading this.

i stole this off someone else's blog.

Arhm.

Happy birthday Lil! (See I got my ooooown picture)

The pig turns 20.

Happy Birthday Piggy..

happy oinking.. :)

Gmail monkeys.

Who comes up with these atrocious names?

xuxian is not available, but the following usernames are:

• xuxianster
• xuxianenator

My freakin goodness.

Gmail

Im being a post whore as of late, but hey, screw it, i say lets whore it up. Anyway, do any of you tubbehs want a gmail invite? Cause i've got like 50 or smt. I dont even use gmail. Its like a thing, that makes you seem cool. haha. Let me know.

Buy me one.

On a seperate note, im in the computer lab now, and this one girl just walked past me. Just a hint for you whales out there, if you got a big ass tummy, dont be wearing a shirt that's unbuttoned around that region. I know its all about us fattys, but some fattys are just gross. PEace out.

dining out.

take heed fellow fatties, i'm giving you this warning from first hand experience...

never believe anything people at a restaurant tell you!
people lie.

i know, because i myself have been trained to instinctively tell such lies:
1./ "the .... is fresh, infact it was just baked"
(in truth: if you don't see it being prepared on the spot and have to ask if its fresh.. stay clear fatty!)
2./ "i would highly recommend .... because the chef has received lots of compliments from this dish tonight"
(in truth: you sucker, the food is rotting and the only reason it is being advertised is because it has to be sold so it doesn't get dumped out)
3./ "the most popular entree is ...."
(in truth: i'm really pointing randomly to whatever i feel like leading you to think tastes good, hah. or otherwise known as the most expensive thing on the menu.)

i'm especially wary when i eat out anywhere because even if the restaurant has 4* decor and 5*service... really, how different is it from a rat-infested mamak stall run by kutoo-scratchers? sadly, cleanliness and freshness is all very deceiving.

Sinfully delicious.

Pride is excessive belief in one's own abilities, that interferes with the individual's recognition of the grace of God. It has been called the sin from which all others arise. Pride is also known as Vanity.

Envy is the desire for others' traits, status, abilities, or situation.

Gluttony is an inordinate desire to consume more than that which one requires.

Lust is an inordinate craving for the pleasures of the body.

Anger is manifested in the individual who spurns love and opts instead for fury. It is also known as Wrath.

Greed is the desire for material wealth or gain, ignoring the realm of the spiritual. It is also called Avarice or Covetousness.

Sloth is the avoidance of physical or spiritual work

I've actually commited all 7 sins there is. Im such a bastard, im gonna burn in hell. On another note, i want the Spiderman mask worn in the oc. That would be so cool if anyone can find me one.

Habits.

When bored/lost in class, what do you do?

A) Start drawing some crap ass pictures on your paper (mine is always a stick man flying a kite).
B) Stare out the window.
C) Try to flirt with the cute girl in front or beside you.
D) Play with your phone..

Personally, i do all four choices in no particular order, and i hope you do too! Long live the sloths!