public transport.

After spending about a month in Australia, i can say i hate public transport. Sure its efficient and what not, but dealing with crowds and waiting for the bus/train to come. But here's an effective way to deal with it: Pour coffee on the seat next to you. Not only can nobody sit there, but you get the joy of seeing everyone's disappointment once they realize they cant sit down.

Take note fellow fatties. I dont use public transport in KL, i drive.

winter food.

when the weather gets cold, you become accustomed to crave for food that you would typically avoid otherwise.

things that taste really good when the weather is cold:
*hot chocolate with marshmallows
*soup, stew, chowder
*vietnamese pho
*hot chocolate souffle

i know, im probably missing out on a couple more...?

fine.

since the other post was deemed too short i shall write another one. HAPPY?! anyway, here is our nation, the Grand Duchy of Melawns, so say thank you to my little sister; she showed me her queendom and i made us a grand duchy.

right. i am learning about obesity. this is how you know you are obese:
1. you buy your clothes from specialist shops
2. you are too scared to venture out into the open for fear of
a) breaking furniture
b) getting stuck in doorways
c) getting stuck in turnstiles
d) getting pointed at and laughed at
3. your doctor will not give you contraception because he does not believe anyone will sleep with you
4. your doctor is nauseous when he examines you
5. you get written letters of complaint when you go jogging

um.

i'm not ill.

although i have been walking around in the freezing cold rain. and i think i'm allergic to sugar. apart from the knocking me out every time i eat it, i get a rash on my leg and grainy eyes. but i love it too much. i'm sick in the head. ooh ooh i think i'm getting a sore throat too.

let my whine too.

i feel like im dying too.
i have a really runny nose. and it doesn't help that temperatures outside have been feeling like -30C. my throat is starting to dry up too.
*blegh.
the worse thing about being sick is losing your appetite. i've been living off soup and fruits for the last few days :(

I'm dying, please help.

I remember telling bex about this itch i had in my throat and stuff. Well, that itch has now worsened and i have lost my voice. Not only does it hurt when i cough, no one can ever hear me speak, which just sucks. And, to add insult to injury, i played football and ended up with a messed up hamstring. This sucks ass! Oh, did i mention i slept funny and i got a sore neck now and its on a permanent tilt to the right. This is too much for one day, im gonna go cry myself to sleep now. :(


ps: i thought about it, red just seems too damn bright. i shall be sticking with this colour.

the search continues.

so, after my last disappointment, i'm thinking, "chinatown! they must have porridge" and so we go there for dimsum. get to the restaurant, tick off what we want, and yayy! they have porridge on the menu. i'm happy. until, that is, the waitress comes over and tells me in this totally nonchalant way that they are out of porridge, with no concern for my dashed hopes and dreams. i am devastated.

dissolution of plain uniform white text.

lilac is so much prettier :) than *pfft.. red.

aren't you glad im a part of your fat lives.. ive brought colour to this blog ;)


william edit: RED RED RED > every other colour.

new domain.

The blog now has a new domain. http://www.melawns.tk

And i think it'd be cool if we all had our unique colour. I choose red. After all, lilea does have that god awful colour but its ok, she's just a sidekick. HAHA!

bugger.

so, this is what happened when i went to look for porridge. my non-fat buddy (i knew i shouldn't have trusted a non-fatty) goes, "oh, every chinese restaurant will have porridge i'm sure i'm sure". i'm like, "are you sure?"; he's like, "yes yes promise promise". so since i want porridge with duck we go to four seasons and lo and behold they DON'T DO PORRIDGE. i don't understand why there isn't more love in the world for porridge.

my favourite lunch.

my favourite lunch is *drum roll*... DIM SUM.
and it has to be lunch/brunch because all day dim sum never tastes as good. there is also something about waking up late and starting your day with a wide range of food :)

must have (with no preference):-
*harkow : shrimp in soft dumpling
*chicken feet (it looks gross and its probably really filthy since its from a chicken coop but no dimsum can be complete without it)
*tan tart : egg tart (my favourite! and yes, im one of those people who eats sweet stuff in the middle of the meal.. eyy, if its good food, why should you wait to eat it? :P)
*lohmaikai : glutinous rice with meat (too much of this and you feel soo weighed down)
*har cheongfan : chee cheongfan with shrimp, served in soya sauce (this is seriously good stuff!)
*charsiew pau : steamed bun with pork (definately beats kaihpau)
*wookohk : yam in shredded fried pastry
*fried sotong

becky, note: the exclusion of porridge? :P

YUMMY.
and of course, this should all be accompanied with chinese tea (just not jasmine tea).. to wash the oil down so you can consume more food :D:D

p.s. how do you like my poor effort with spelling out chinese pronounciations? william, dont laugh.

i am also craving food.

porridge!! i don't know why but i want some now. and willy has been incredibly unsupportive. what kind of fat buddy is he anyway? bet i can eat more ramlee burgers and a&w chicken than he can. hehehe.

i will be in this state of discontent and irritation until i eat that porridge. so i am going out to find some with a buddy. who isn't fat. :( wish you guys were here so we could have fat meetings everyday.

stupid couples.

Family wedding dinners are a waste of time. There you meet random aunties and uncles you got to say hi to, and there's always a fat man or a fat woman singing karaoke that make william hung seem specatacular. Food's always good tho. Here it is, according to the fart rating system:

four season dish: arhm arHm
sharks fin: nibble
pig pig: ARHM ARHM ARHM
fish: arhm
prawns: arhm
veg: nibble
fried pancake: ARHM ARHM ARHM
little dumplings: ARHM ARHM ARHM

i cant remember the other dishes. meh.

food craving.

i have a two hour class on jane austen in ten minutes.. oh joy.

but right now, im really really reaaallly craving:-
1./ roti canai with curry.
2./ teh tarik, kurang manis.
3./ ais kacang (not as much as the other two, because its so damn cold here right now)

okie.. im off to class where i'll fall asleep/daydream about the three/stare at my watch.

fat power!! :)

road to fame.

American Idol auditions really make me cringe. Its bad enough you suck balls on national tv, in front of your whole country, but people halfway around the world get to point and laugh too. Sucks to be them. I bet becky could belt a better tune than them. haha.

IM HUNGRY!!!

welcome, sidekick!

you know what. there is a big fat bee flying around my flat. FAT. and it can't get out .. the fatness has it. anyway since i just got back from watching 'closer' i am going to rate things to eat in KFC with the rating system used in fart because that film held no significance for me whatsoever.

mashed potatoes: arhm arhm arhm
coleslaw: arhm
fries: nibble
original flavour chicken: arhm arhm!
hot and spicy: ARHM ARHM ARHM!
hot wings: ARHM ARHM!
new mini burger: arhm.

there. i've posted. like a week's worth.

and btw willy i totally agree about that exercising thing; i busted my ankle walking on the spot a couple years ago and it took months to heal.

say hi to your fellow fatty

yay!! im now a part of the fatty blog.
and that is very very important because everyone knows that all fatties must stick together :)
anyway, im willing to forgive you both for excluding me.. i understand how tough it is when you only have time to eat. you tend to forget about others. its a selfish fatster world out there.. always gobbling down food to fill your tummy.. its a full time job.
but.. hey, why am i only a sidekick? :(


william edit: you're just not up to our fat level yet. patience my young apprentice. soon you shall join us up in the fat ranks.

shape up?

If you were thinking of exercising:

You'll probably just break your ankle or twist your knee. You have to be in shape to get into shape. Its a no win situation..

um

why are you hurt, oh rock?

hurt.

I am a rock, and a rock feels no pain.

superheroes.

Someone should invent action figures that are fat and have no super powers. Then the youth of today might respect people like me.

sarnies.

carnies sounds like sarnies. that makes me hungry.

carnies.

When i see professional clowns, mimes or people who make balloon animals, i always think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be.

AHHHHHHHH

i wanna go home. i feel sick, there is a vitamin stuck in my throat and i have to do work and laundry and grocery shopping. and i'm craving biscuits.

Cookies.

I bought a pack of low fat cookies that had 50 percent more cookies in the box than usual, so if i ate the whole box i'd gain more weight than if it was a regular size box of cookies. They should clal these types of cookies "High Fats" because thats what everyone's going to say when i walk in the room.

wait

fat people don't prosper they go broke because they spend all their money on food. that is our fate.

i am fat too

blob blob. the fatness is putting too much stress on my ankles.

I'm fat.

Fat people prosper.

bugger again.

so, the search for porridge continues. i thought, "chinatown! they must have porridge" so we go for dim sum in chinatown. sit down, start ticking off what we want, and woo hoo! they have porridge on the menu. so i'm like yayyyy! and then, the waitress comes over, and starts telling me in this totally nonchalant way that they are out, with no concern for my dashed hopes and dreams.

anyway, my buddies are over and we must go find food. i will keep you updated on my search for porridge.