A random waste of time.

(The following story is based on actual events that never actually happened.)

The other day, I was doing nothing at all, when suddenly I realized that I should probably breathe, else I shall surely perish. So I started breathing.

Crisis evaded.

After breathing for a while, I realized that doing nothing but breathing all day was pretty boring, so I began to prepare for grand adventurous adventures in the mystifyingly unknown depths of which I like to call "outside." I put on my super-sexy outside-going-grand-adventurous-adventures superhero outfit, and hopped out my bedroom window.

I should have opened it first. Bursting through glass is more painful than it looks on TV.

Once I finished picking shards of glass from my face, as well as other parts of my personal person, I leapt into action! Striding at a leisurely pace around the backyard, and through the gate (which I opened first), I was now standing beside my trusty Modus Transportus... The Car (I fail at naming stuff with cool names). With The Car, I can move quickly about outside, and find many grand adventurous adventures for sure! All I need to do is unlock the ...

Unlock ...

Blast! I had forgotten my keys!

My mission of grand adventurous adventures was foiled before it began. So I went back around the house to my bedroom and leapt back through the window (wrong window ... more glass), and went to sleep.

The End!